impacted

I should be happy.
Really.
But true to my most recent tradition:
I can’t be happy.
Something always happens.
My life is starting to feel like an episode of Rosalinda.
I’ll give you an overview of how things have been lately so you can understand why I am moping like a whiny child. I know it’s been a while since my last post but I’ll do my best to catch you up without going into any unnecessary rants.
Mel and I have been doing pretty good. We’ve been texting and hanging out. But she had to leave on Thursday (I think) to go to the Jazz Festival in Reno, Nevada. I have been hanging out with Sarah a ton lately. I went to her house on Wed before church, we went to the media in art room for lunch on Thursday, I hung out with her after school before going to the school play “Witness for the Prosecution” and then ended up spending the night at her house [along with Nikki and Alyssa] and then stayed over until noon on Saturday. Yeah, we hang out too much because I’m starting to talk like her more and more. After my dad picked me up from her house on Saturday, he took me to my grandparent’s house where I fell asleep for a few hours until it was time to go to a family party for some little kid named Carlos. I’m not exactly sure how I’m related to them but all that mattered was that family parties always result in one excellent thing, FOOD! Apparently I have a relative that goes to my high school that I had never met before so my grandma was adamant that she introduce us and make us become buddies so as soon as we get to the party my grandma finds Tommy and brings him over to my sister and I and introduces us. After saying hello, there was an awkward silence from all parties involved until it was time to grab some delicious food. I was very disappointed ion my family because I was under the belief that with so many Mexicans in one place, there was bound to be a taco lady and some bomb Mexican food but they had white people food- hamburgers and hotdogs. Really? We have to put up with white people all the time and eat their gross food; we should be able to have our own delicious cultural meals when we have family parties. But I ate my hamburger with as much joy as I could muster. After talking to various family members whose names I can never remember (but they always remember mine…) my grandpa wanted to leave so Amelia and I left with him. I hung out at my grandparent’s house for a while until my dad picked me up and I went home. I’m not sure what I did but I pulled various muscles all over my body and they were now killing me, so I downed some Advil and chilled on the couch for a while. I eventually talked my dad into watching Twilight because he had never seen it before. Everyone got situated on the couch and we started watching it, but not before Legally Blonde had ended on FX. My breath still gets taken away when you see Edward walk into the cafeteria for the first time. I was practically falling asleep from exhaustion so as soon as the movie ended, I went to my room and was out like a light. So that was last night… right? Okay so this morning I had to get up and do the whole morning routine (eat, get dressed, make-up, hair, etc.) and got in the car to go to school. Most of the way to school, my dad’s cell rang so I answered it for him since he was driving. It was my grandma. Her brother died last night. It hit me like a ton of bricks. Another death? So soon? Why? At school all I could think about was how close we all are to death and it really scared me. Today was fairly hazy because I was off in my own thoughts for most of it. Mel gave me a gift from her trip to Reno- a really pretty necklace that has a guitar on it. I came home and played around on my guitar, did some homework, and watched TV. I have things to do but today is just not a day to be doing things. I need to wallow in my own self insignificance and mortality for a few days before I can move on. This has incited a round of depression that I won’t soon forget. I need to go take some Advil…



Bye.

The most important human endeavor is the striving for morality in our actions. Our inner balance and even our very existence depend on it. Only morality in our actions can give beauty and dignity to life.

Albert Einstein